A petty thief, a teacher and a lawyer die and go to heaven.
When they get there they are stopped by St. Peter, who then says, “Sorry, heaven’s crowding up, so you need to answer a question correctly, or else you can’t get in.”
He looks at the teacher, and asks her: “W...
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November 22, 2007 22:24 byAdmin
A man was speeding down the highway, feeling secure in a group of cars all traveling at the same speed; however, as they passed a speed trap, he got nailed with an infrared speed detector and was pulled over.The officer handed him the citation, received his signature and was about to walk away when ...
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November 22, 2007 20:01 byAdmin
Any of your neighbors has ever spent Halloween night at the bottom of a hole because you moved their outhouse back about four feet.You've ever lost a dog to a bush hog.You've ever been arrested for a DUI on a riding lawn mower.You keep your teeth and your goldfish in the same glass.On average, one o...
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November 21, 2007 18:28 byAdmin
Doctor: Did you know that there are more than 1,000 bones in the human body?Larry: Shhh, doctor! There are three dogs outside in the waiting room!
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November 20, 2007 14:38 byAdmin
A blonde golfer goes into the pro shop and looks around frowning.
Finally the pro askes her what she wants. “I can’t find any green golf balls,” the blonde golfer complains.
The pro looks all over the shop, and through all the catalogs, and finally calls the manufacturers and det...
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November 19, 2007 17:16 byAdmin
The "Stella" awards rank up there with the Darwin awards. Stella Liebeck is the 81 year old lady who spilled coffee on herself and sued McDonalds. This case inspired an annual award: The "Stella" Award - for the most frivolous lawsuits in the U. S.The following are this year's ca...
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November 19, 2007 10:07 byAdmin
A group of girlfriends is on vacation when they see a 5-story hotel with a sign that reads: “For Women Only”. Since they are without their boyfriends and husbands, they decide to go in. The Bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it works.
“We have 5 floors. Go up flo...
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November 18, 2007 13:41 byAdmin
Old telephone books make ideal personal address books. Simply cross out the names and addresses of people you don't know.Fool other drivers into thinking you have an expensive car phone by holding an old TV or video remote control up to your ear and occasionally swerving across the road and mounting...
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November 17, 2007 09:32 byAdmin
Q: Why do men become smarter during sex?
A: Because they are plugged into a genius.
Q: Why don’t women blink during foreplay?
A: They don’t have time.
Q: Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg?
A: They won’t stop for directions.
Q: Why did God put men on earth?
A: Beca...
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November 16, 2007 22:23 byAdmin
What happens when people of different occupations get old.- Old accountants never die, they just lose their balance.- Old actors never die, they just drop apart.- Old archers never die, they just bow and quiver.- Old architects never die, they just lose their structures.- Old bankers never die, they...
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November 14, 2007 21:16 byAdmin