A man was speeding down the highway, feeling secure in a group of cars all traveling at the same speed; however, as they passed a speed trap, he got nailed with an infrared speed detector and was pulled over.The officer handed him the citation, received his signature and was about to walk away when ...
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November 22, 2007 20:01 byAdmin
Any of your neighbors has ever spent Halloween night at the bottom of a hole because you moved their outhouse back about four feet.You've ever lost a dog to a bush hog.You've ever been arrested for a DUI on a riding lawn mower.You keep your teeth and your goldfish in the same glass.On average, one o...
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November 21, 2007 18:28 byAdmin
Two guys are in a locker room when one guy notices the other guy has a cork in his ass.
He says, “How’d you get a cork in your ass?”
The other guy says, “I was walking along the beach and I tripped over a lamp. There was a puff of smoke, and then a red man in a turban came oo...
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November 21, 2007 17:28 byAdmin
During a moment of brilliance, and a man buys several sheep in hopes of breeding them for wool. He figured it’d be an excellent way to make some extra money. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant and calls a veterinarian for help. The vet tells him he shou...
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November 20, 2007 21:38 byAdmin
The "Stella" awards rank up there with the Darwin awards. Stella Liebeck is the 81 year old lady who spilled coffee on herself and sued McDonalds. This case inspired an annual award: The "Stella" Award - for the most frivolous lawsuits in the U. S.The following are this year's ca...
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November 19, 2007 10:07 byAdmin
Kidnappers are not very interested in you. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first. No one expects you to run into a burning building. People call at 9 p.m. and ask, "Did I wake you?" People no longer view you as a hypochondriac. There's nothing left to learn the hard wa...
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November 17, 2007 07:30 byAdmin
Q: Why do men become smarter during sex?
A: Because they are plugged into a genius.
Q: Why don’t women blink during foreplay?
A: They don’t have time.
Q: Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg?
A: They won’t stop for directions.
Q: Why did God put men on earth?
A: Beca...
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November 16, 2007 22:23 byAdmin
Five Englishmen boarded a train just behind five Scots, who, as a group had only purchased one ticket. Just before the conductor came through, all the Scots piled into the toilet stall at the back of the car. As the conductor passed the stall, he knocked and called "Tickets, please!" and o...
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November 16, 2007 20:25 byAdmin
10. You ticked him off once, and your next phone bill was for $20,000.9. He's won the Publisher's Clearing House sweepstakes 3 years running.8. When asked for his phone number, he gives it in hex.7. Seems strangely calm whenever the office computer network goes down.6. Somehow gets HBO on his PC at ...
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November 15, 2007 08:47 byAdmin
What happens when people of different occupations get old.- Old accountants never die, they just lose their balance.- Old actors never die, they just drop apart.- Old archers never die, they just bow and quiver.- Old architects never die, they just lose their structures.- Old bankers never die, they...
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November 14, 2007 21:16 byAdmin