Confucius Says:

War does not determine who's right. War determine who's left.

Man who sleeps on road, wakes up feeling run down.

Man who tell one too many light bulb jokes soon burn out."

A bird in hand makes hard to blow nose.

When called an idiot sometimes is better to be quiet, than open mouth and remove all doubt.

Marriage is like game of poker. You start with pair and end with full house.

He who thinks only of number one must remember this number is next to nothing

Man who cut self while shaving, lose face.

People who make Confucius joke speak bad English.